I’m no actor, but conducting a job search can certainly feel like an endless cycle of auditions. You do research, memorize lines, & deliver several tailored monologues to countless people in hopes of landing your coveted role. Through all of this, you are doing your best to be your best authentic self when you show up to each interaction. Doing this consistently is hard, but it can be even harder if you are also feeling depressed, anxious, or managing challenging life circumstances, nevermind a global pandemic.
Let’s not forget that while you are job searching, there is no pause button for the other roles you play in your life. You don’t get to temporarily stop being a spouse/partner, parent, caretaker, or friend, just so you can focus on your job search. The regular demands of your time and energy in these roles coupled with the added stress of conducting a job search can be a lot for anyone to handle. Let’s collectively acknowledge that this isn’t easy, and that’s ok. The question is, how can you manage these various roles/responsibilities, demands of your time, energy, & emotions in a way that works best?
For some, the answer might be... therapy.
In the context of job searching, a key finding from a 2016 study by Benjamin J. Pfeifer & Daniel R. Strunk published in the Journal of Clinical Psychology, demonstrated that participants who reported greater use of CBT-type skills (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy) were more likely to have received a job offer. Though this study specifically focuses on the effects of CBT tools, there are a range of therapeutic techniques & approaches that might fit you better and help you make progress.
According to Tamir Reyes, LCSW, “therapy is one of the best forms of self-care as you are intentionally setting aside time to say, ‘this is about me growing and getting better with my mental & emotional health’.” On the daily, I’m a husband, father, & career coach -- but during my weekly therapy sessions, I get to pick which identity is most salient, issue is most pressing, and which challenging thought(s) or emotion(s) I want to explore so that I can feel and think better.
5 Ways Therapy Can Benefit Your Job Search
Anxiety, depression, & other life issues can be heightened by a job search, especially if you are unemployed. You don’t have to be in crisis to seek therapy. You determine when you are ready. When you do, therapy can...
1) Normalize & Validate What You’re Experiencing
Job searching can be a rather isolating experience, and at times it can feel as if whatever you’re going through is only happening to you. Therapy can help affirm what’s true about your experience while helping you attain a better perspective on what’s not. Knowledge that you’re not the only one facing a particular challenge (normalization) can be incredibly freeing. Gaining confirmation and/or language to describe or even pinpoint your experience (validation) can be greatly empowering. We all just want to be seen.
Therapy is a powerful medium to help you feel seen, which can impact how you show up and present yourself.
2) Provide Space to Process Your Internal State of Being
The ups & downs of job searching, especially dealing with rejection, is universal. We’re often in a high state of mental and emotional activation, which can impact our internal dialogue & self-talk. Therapy not only helps you process WHAT thoughts/emotions come up for you but also WHY they come up. This happens through processing more deeply rooted issues, says Reyes, LCSW. Bringing these internal issues to your conscious awareness can help you be more successful in interacting with the external world.
Therapy provides greater self-awareness + empowers you to make informed changes in how you navigate the rigors of daily life, including a job search.
3) Provide You With New & Healthier Coping Skills
We all face different stressors and triggers in our lives and we’ve all developed various ways to cope. Reyes, LCSW deftly points out that, “though you may already have ways that you cope, they may not be healthy ways to cope.” Job searching is by nature stressful, and you may encounter triggers through certain people or situations that might challenge your existing set of coping skills. Some may work, while others may no longer be effective, or can even be harmful. For example, therapy can help you identify inaccurate thoughts about yourself (e.g. feelings of inadequacy). By teaching you how to identify, challenge, & reframe inaccurate thoughts, this Cognitive Behavioral Therapy tool can help you cope better in general and in critical moments such as right before you go into an interview.
Therapy provides concrete tools & techniques to help you identify and better respond to your own stressors and triggers in both personal & professional settings.
4) Help You Set Healthier Boundaries and Clarify Goals & Values
Saying “no” doesn’t come easily to all of us, whether by nature or nurture. Saying “yes” can be equally hard if we aren’t exactly sure what we want. Saying either is also challenging if we aren’t quite sure what we stand for or what we are willing to accept for ourselves. Professionals often stay in toxic jobs too long, endure abuse in their job search, pass on the right job or accept the wrong offer when they are unable to set healthy boundaries for themselves, are unclear on their goals, or haven’t clarified which values are most important to them.
Boundary-setting is a work in progress for so many. This is especially true in the professional world where power dynamics, gender norms, marginalized identities, intersections, & the desire for recognition and advancement all influence our ability or even freedom to say “yes” or “no” and successfully navigate the settings we occupy.
[Good] Therapy operates from a strengths-based perspective, believing that you have these answers within you. Therapy helps you identify your boundaries, set goals, & clarify values while supporting you to live them out both personally & professionally.
5) Help You Better Navigate Relationships
One of the most powerful and healing aspects of therapy is simply the relationship with your therapist itself. Human relationships, whether family, romantic, or professional, are major sources of stress and also trauma. The impacts of our family and other formative relationship experiences can significantly shape how we approach relationships as adults regarding anything from trust to our assumptions or perceptions of the actions & intentions of others. Therapy offers you space to delve into the intricacies & depths of any relationship of your choosing. It can check your perspective, challenge assumptions, even help you seek or attain resolution or closure. Successfully navigating a job search, not to mention professional advancement, is strongly predicated upon your ability to establish, build, & maintain relationships.
Therapy can help you show up differently or better in significant relationships in your life by helping you practice new ways of being and integrating them into your life.
These are just 5 of the many benefits that going to therapy can provide you as a professional, both in the job search and as it relates to your career development and advancement.
How to Access Therapy
This all sounds great -- but how do I access therapy? First, if you have employer-based health insurance this is a useful path for access. Many insurance companies are waving co-pays for therapy during the pandemic. Otherwise, if you don’t have adequate insurance coverage or any at all, here are some resources to find low-cost therapy options:
Finally, no matter what route you take into therapy, there is no rule that you have to go weekly. In the past, I’ve attended therapy twice a month because it’s what worked best for my budget.
There’s no shame in seeking therapy.
Think of it as dedicated time for you to work on being the best version of yourself so you can perform your best across your various life roles.
Lights. Camera. Action!
Need help navigating the ups & downs of your job search? I’d love to support you!
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